Monday, August 31, 2009

Puppy!!!

After the last innocent kid post here, here is another one. Well kids does says the darnest things but in Malaysia, you never know. LoL!

A small kid and his dad were walking on the street whan they saw two dogs having sex. The small kid asked his father "Daddy, what are they doing?" *pointing at the dogs
The dad said, "Oh! They are making a puppy".

A few days later, the small kid walks in on his parents having sex.

The small kid says "Daddy, what are you doing?"
The dad replied, "Making a baby here."

Guess what the kid say now?

The kid said
"Hmmmm, can you please flip Mommy around? I'd rather have a puppy instead!"

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Cannibal Mum

Sorry that I have been busy lately and would continue to be busy till.... Erm I really dunno till when actually..

I went to the supermarket earlier and saw a small little girl looking at a pregnant lady



She asked the lady "Why is your stomach so big auntie?"
The lady said "I am having a baby."
Then she asked again with her big eyes looking at the lady "Is the baby inside your stomach?"
The lady smiled and said "Yes!"
Then the little girl asked "Is it a good baby?"
She said "Yes. It is a really good baby."
The girl give her a surprised look and asked "Then why you eat the baby?"


I nearly rolled on the floor laughing out loud with tears in my eyes that moment.

Moral of the story: Kids are innocent and those that aren't are hamsap. Wuahahaha

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Free Wifi WTF!!!

Just the other day I see a free wifi sign on the tree when I go mamak for my supper. Then the next visit I bring my laptop lo since free wifi ma. My main aim? Steal Use their electricity and save on my monthly electric bill lo. See the sign?

I then set up everything with the cables done. Guess what happen next?

Me - Neh neh, teh tarik stengah glas(like the u mobile ad) Neh neh, kenapa tarak wifi?(How come no wifi?)
Mamak - (scratches head) wifi ah? apa itu?(wifi? what is that?)
Me - (points to the sign on the tree) Internet la
Mamak - Oh itu ka. Lu ikut I mai sini. Kena duduk atas pokok baru ada.(Follow me. You need to sit on the tree only will get connection)
Me - WTF!!!

So it's just a gimmick like McD near Taylors Subang. You will never get connected. Bloody hell...

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Masturbating kills!!!

Warning:- 18SX post ahead!, Siu di di and Siu mui mui go sleep ok? I am not responsible if you read any further.

Yes you read it right. You can die from masturbating. Yes I know what you are thinking -> WTH!!!

This is according to what Dr V.M.Palaniappan,Ph.D.,who has been a practising ecologist and an academician in the University of Malaya for a very long time said in his blog. The first when I read it I am like WTH?? Masturbating kills but sex doesn't? Okok. Our doc here argues that the friction creates heat and in turn increases the body acidity which would lower the immune system. Then you get H1N1 and die. LoL. So see it does kill. But wait.....

Sex doesn't create friction heat mea? Oh, got lubricant is it? Sorry la I am dumb ma. So young and innocent so I dunno. Wait har. Let's see. Say the friction on the rod. what's the formula to calculate the surface area of s syllinder again? Okok I found it. It's height X 2 Pi radius. Okla I am having wishfull thinking here. Say we get a bloody long rod of 9 inches. Hey I said wishful thinking ok? That's 22.9 cm or for the sake of calculation, 23cm in height.

Ok wishfull thinking again that the rod'd diameter is 3 inch la. Wishful thinking ma! Not German sausage la. German sausage smaller la. LOL. That gives us radius of 3.8 cm or 4 cm for easy calculation. So thats equals to 8 X Pi which gives us around 25cm for the perimeter of the "rod". Multiply that with the height of the rod, you get 575 cm square area which creates heat.

Say I am dumb la and traditional la. Sex in a missionary position and calculate the area of contact between the male and female. Okok, male and male, female and female also counted ok? Okla add half halves into the equation also la since I need to be fair ma. Calculate just the area of stomach contact alone. Say wishful thinking again. we get 575 cm square area also. Isn't that the same amount of friction heat generated by the movement?

No? Oh sorry la I didn't know you put butter in between when you have the union. I think with this new findings, the popularity of couples having their "union" in the pool would increase tremendously to avoid friction heat. No meh? Water absorb heat(as long you don't do in hot water la) so no friction heat ma. No ah? Then I also dunno how lo.

Our friend also say overweight and obese people can retain more calcium which provides higher immunity le. Wait ah. Isn't obese and overweight people categorized in the high risk section for H1N1? Guys update me la. I am busy so no time read news le.

Moral of the story? Go get a portable water tub which would some on handy. Or stock them and start selling them to couples for H1N1 prevention. Butter seller can also stock more. LOL

Read more here

If I make any mistake here, feel free to correct me la. I am also in the learning process ma.
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